Navratri, one of the most revered festivals in India, is not just about fasting, dancing, and devotion; it’s also a time of spiritual reflection and purity. For couples, this festival offers a unique opportunity to bond on a deeper level while observing rituals together.
Whether you’re newly married or have spent years together, following Navratri rules as a couple can bring a renewed sense of connection and shared purpose.
In this blog, we’ll explore some key rules and practices that couples can follow during Navratri to make the most of this spiritual celebration.
Navratri Rules for Couples Observing Celibacy
A. If Both Partners Are Fasting
When both husband and wife observe the fast, it becomes more than a ritual—it is a shared spiritual journey. Couples who fast together not only strengthen their devotion to Goddess Durga but also deepen their bond through mutual discipline and support.
1. Maintain Celibacy (Brahmacharya)
Couples are advised to avoid intimacy and physical relations during Navratri. The nine days are dedicated to Goddess Durga, and practicing celibacy ensures purity of body and mind. It helps channel energy into devotion, prayer, and spiritual growth rather than worldly desires.
2. Satvik Food Only
Meals should be prepared with vrat-approved ingredients like kuttu, singhara, sabudana, fruits, and dairy. Cooking together or sharing responsibilities in preparing satvik food can itself be an act of devotion. Eating simple food symbolizes humility and discipline.
3. Puja Together
Performing daily puja, aarti, or chanting mantras as a couple enhances the spiritual atmosphere of the home. Many couples also read Durga Saptashati or light the akhand jyot (unbroken flame) together, seeking blessings for marital harmony and family well-being.
4. Discipline in Sleeping
Some traditions suggest that couples should sleep separately during Navratri. This reinforces celibacy, avoids the possibility of physical intimacy, and helps maintain focus on devotion during these sacred days.
B. If Only One Partner Is Fasting
In many households, either the husband or the wife keeps the fast while the other does not. This does not reduce the sanctity of the festival, as long as there is mutual respect and support.
1. Respect the Fasting Partner
The non-fasting partner should refrain from cooking or consuming non-vegetarian food, alcohol, or dishes with onion and garlic at home. Even if they are not fasting, maintaining a satvik environment helps honor the partner’s devotion.
2. Avoid Tempting Foods
Eating rich or indulgent meals in front of the fasting partner can make it harder for them to stay disciplined. A thoughtful gesture is to eat lighter meals or keep tempting foods outside the home during Navratri.
3. Support with Cooking
The non-fasting partner can assist by preparing vrat-friendly meals or helping with meal planning. This not only reduces the burden on the fasting partner but also creates a sense of shared responsibility.
4. Join in Rituals
Fasting is one form of devotion, but puja, chanting, and attending aarti are equally important. The non-fasting partner can still actively participate in spiritual activities, ensuring that both partners grow together in faith.
5. Maintain Purity at Home (Including Intimacy)
Purity extends to food, thoughts, actions, and physical relations. Even if only one partner is fasting, couples are advised to avoid intimacy during Navratri to honor the sanctity of the occasion. Maintaining a calm, devotional environment ensures that the spiritual energy of the household remains intact.
Can Couples Have Physical Relations During Navratri Fast?
The short answer is No. During Navratri, couples are advised to observe brahmacharya (celibacy) as a mark of spiritual discipline. Physical relations, including sexual intimacy, are avoided because the body and mind are meant to stay pure and focused on devotion to Goddess Durga.
What About Hugging and Kissing?
This is a common question among couples. While hugging or showing simple affection is not strictly forbidden, it is recommended to keep expressions of love subtle and pure during these nine days. The idea is to avoid arousing desires that may break the discipline of brahmacharya.
- Hugging for support – Allowed, especially as an emotional gesture of care.
- A quick kiss on the forehead or cheek – Generally acceptable if done with affection, not passion.
- Romantic or passionate kissing – Best avoided, as it can easily lead to intimacy, which is restricted during Navratri.
Balancing Love and Devotion
Couples don’t need to distance themselves completely. Instead, they can:
- Spend quality time together in prayer.
- Cook vrat-friendly meals together.
- Support each other’s spiritual journey.
- Express love through care, kindness, and understanding rather than physical intimacy.
Couples should avoid sexual relations during Navratri fast. Gentle gestures like hugs or forehead kisses are fine if they remain pure and supportive. The focus of these nine days should be on spiritual bonding rather than physical intimacy.
Also Read: How to Do Navratri Fasting: A Complete Guide
Can We Do Sex in Navratri Without Fasting?
Even if you’re not fasting, sex during Navratri is traditionally discouraged, as the festival is meant for purity and devotion.
Why Is It Discouraged?
- Spiritual focus: Navratri is dedicated to Goddess Durga, and devotees are encouraged to channel their energy into prayers, meditation, and rituals.
- Concept of Brahmacharya: Practicing celibacy is seen as a way to conserve energy and elevate one’s spiritual consciousness.
- Energy balance: In Hindu philosophy, sex is associated with rajas (desire) and tamas (inertia), which can disturb the sattvic (pure) state ideal for worship.
What If You’re Not Fasting?
- Not fasting doesn’t remove the spiritual essence of Navratri.
- Many still avoid sex out of respect for the sacred period.
- However, in modern practice, couples who see Navratri as more cultural than spiritual may not follow this restriction.
Takeaway: If you’re observing Navratri mainly for spiritual reasons, abstaining is advised. If you’re not fasting and not strictly religious, it becomes a matter of personal choice.
Can You Lip Kiss While Fasting in Hindu Tradition?
A lip kiss is not explicitly forbidden in scriptures, but it may dilute the spirit of restraint during fasting.
The Spiritual Angle
- Fasting is about more than food — it’s about controlling desires and senses.
- Physical affection, even a kiss, can awaken emotional or sexual thoughts, which some believe distracts from devotion.
Modern Understanding
- For many young couples, a kiss is a sign of love, not lust.
- If the fast is symbolic (dietary only), they may not see it as conflicting.
- Strict devotees, however, avoid even small gestures of intimacy to keep the fast completely sattvic.
Takeaway: If your fast is about spiritual discipline, avoid lip kissing. If it’s more symbolic, decide based on your intention and comfort level.
Can We Have Intercourse During Navratri?
Intercourse is generally avoided during Navratri as it is believed to lower spiritual purity and focus.
Why Do People Avoid It?
- Purity of devotion: The nine nights are about connecting deeply with the Divine Feminine, and sex may be seen as misdirecting that energy.
- Energetic belief: Hindu texts often link sexual activity with loss of ojas (vital energy), which devotees try to preserve for worship.
- Cultural norms: Many families pass down the belief that intercourse during sacred periods (Navratri, Ekadashi, Shravan) should be avoided.
Variations in Practice
- Strict households: Complete abstinence is followed.
- Moderate households: People may fast and pray but don’t impose restrictions on marital intimacy.
- Modern couples: Often decide privately, balancing devotion with relationship needs.
👉 Takeaway: There is no universal ban, but tradition favors abstinence. It’s best to follow the path that respects both your faith and your relationship harmony.
Can You Hug While Fasting in Hinduism?
Hugging is usually acceptable as long as it’s affectionate and not sexual.
Why It’s Generally Allowed
- Non-sexual gesture: A hug is often just warmth, care, or greeting.
- Intention matters: If it is pure and respectful, it doesn’t break the spirit of the fast.
- Family bonds: Hugs between parents, siblings, or children are seen as natural expressions of love, not as distractions from devotion.
When It May Not Be Suitable
- If the hug is romantic and leads to desire, it can be viewed as breaking discipline.
- Strict devotees who avoid all physical intimacy during Navratri may also avoid hugging.
👉 Takeaway: Hugging is fine in most cases, but keep it wholesome and aligned with the spirit of your fast.
Why Do Couples Avoid Physical Intimacy During Navratri?
The main reason couples avoid physical intimacy during Navratri is to purify both the mind and body. Here’s why:
- Spiritual Growth: By avoiding physical relationships, couples can focus their energy on prayer and connecting with the divine.
- Purification: Navratri is a time to cleanse the body and mind, and following this rule helps remove distractions from daily life.
- Self-Control: It also teaches self-discipline and control, which are important values in the spiritual journey.
Strengthening Your Emotional Connection During Navratri
During Navratri, even though physical intimacy is not allowed, it’s a great opportunity for couples to build emotional closeness.
1. Open Communication
Talk openly with your partner about your feelings and challenges during fasting. It helps in supporting each other and staying connected.
- Share Your Experiences: Discuss how the fasting is going, the challenges you face, and how you can help each other through them.
- Talk About Your Dreams: Use this time to share your goals, dreams, and deeper thoughts, which strengthens emotional intimacy.
2. Acts of Kindness
Show love through simple, non-physical acts like cooking a meal for your partner, helping with chores, or offering encouragement during fasting.
- Cook Together: Prepare fasting meals together. It can be a fun way to spend time and show care for each other.
- Give Each Other Space: If one partner needs time alone for prayer or rest, respect that space to maintain peace and balance.
Read more: When to Break Navratri Fast: A Complete Guide
Handling Physical and Emotional Desires During Navratri
It’s natural for couples to feel physical and emotional closeness during Navratri. Instead of focusing on these desires, channel your energy into positive activities.
1. Redirect Your Energy
When you feel the urge for physical intimacy, do something productive like exercise, yoga, or meditate together. It helps in balancing the mind and body.
2. Stay Focused on Your Spiritual Goals
Remind yourself why you’re fasting and what you aim to achieve through this period. Keeping your spiritual goals in mind will help you stay committed to the practice.
3. Keep Yourself Busy
Plan activities that keep you engaged, like going for temple visits, attending spiritual events, or spending time in nature. Staying busy can help avoid temptations.
Support Each Other During Fasting
Fasting for nine days can be difficult, so it’s important for couples to support each other.
- Cook Navratri Meals Together: Make meals that follow fasting rules. It can be a fun activity and help both partners stay on track.
- Stay Hydrated and Rest: Remind each other to drink enough water and take breaks when needed, as fasting can be tiring.
- Be Patient: Fasting may cause irritability, so be patient and kind to each other during this time.
Conclusion: Celebrating Navratri as a Couple
Navratri is a time of devotion, self-discipline, and reflection. For couples, practicing celibacy during this period can help focus on their spiritual journey while also building emotional closeness.
By engaging in prayer, acts of kindness, and open communication, couples can come out of Navratri feeling more connected both spiritually and emotionally.
May Goddess Durga bless your relationship with love, peace, and harmony during this Navratri!
FAQs
Can You Kiss While Fasting During Navratri?
It is generally advised to avoid physical affection, including kissing, during Navratri. This period is meant for spiritual cleansing, and practicing celibacy helps in maintaining purity of both mind and body. Instead of physical intimacy, focus on spending quality time through spiritual activities like prayers, aarti, or meditation.
Husband-Wife Relationship During Navratri
The husband-wife relationship during Navratri should be centered around mutual support and devotion. Physical intimacy is avoided, but this doesn’t mean emotional closeness should suffer. Couples can still connect deeply by participating in religious activities together, offering acts of kindness, and engaging in meaningful conversations.
What Are the Restrictions During Navratri for Couples?
The main restrictions for couples during Navratri revolve around maintaining purity and discipline. Couples are advised to avoid physical intimacy, including kissing, hugging, or sexual relations, as these days are dedicated to celibacy and devotion. They must also follow fasting rules, such as abstaining from non-vegetarian food, alcohol, onion, garlic, and certain grains, while consuming only vrat-approved meals. Most importantly, the focus should remain on spiritual practices like puja, aarti, and meditation, while avoiding distractions connected to worldly pleasures.
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